Noise reducing Nano?

For NRBPs (non-resident Bombay Parsis) there are pleasant and unpleasant memories of Bombay. The pleasant ones are family reunions, meeting old friends, eating chhamna (pomfrets), boomla (Bombay ducks), doodh naa puff (milk puffs) and bhel puri. The unpleasant memory is the incessant honking on the roads.

Bombay car drivers honk first and think later. It is compulsive, a mania, something beyond their thumb control. I have not seen Ratan Tata’s Nano car yet but hope it has a mechanism which stops drivers from the honko-mania.

Communication has changed enormously over the years. For written words it has evolved from letters and telegrams to telexes, faxes and e-mails. The telephone technology has added call wait, call forward, call back, three-way chat, redial, recall, leave messages, conference calls. But why have car horns remained static over 100 years, not only in India but around the world? The same, monotonous, unmusical and often rude "paeennnnn” and "peep-peep” still rule the roads.

It is often difficult to interpret the honk messages. I once peep-peeped politely to alert a motorist that his headlights were on during a sunny day and received a middle-finger salute accompanied by a three-tiered ear-piercing honk.

In these days of super technology (hawk-eye, snick-o-meter, hot shots, etc in cricket), can’t we make the horn sing or at least talk? For example a pleasant "hi there” when spotting an old friend crossing the street, a happy "thanks, the dinner was great” for a grateful farewell, "wakey, wakey, the lights are green,” "don’t cross the road like a maniac”…Voice-overs of famous singers Asha Bhosle or Brett Lee can be used.

Are these ideas airy-fairy? I think not. If a robotic car navigator instructs you on how to reach your destination, why not a robotic horn system to tell fellow motorists and pedestrians in a musical way where to go? It’s only a matter of placing four different tapes and pressing the right button.

So go for it, value-added but noise-reducing Nano — with a many-splendored horn that oozes friendliness and reduces road rage.

KERSI MEHER-HOMJI

Sydney, Australia

kmeher@bigpond.com.au