“Countering interfaith…”

Noshirwan Mistry in his letter "Countering interfaith…” (Readers’ Forum, Parsiana, March 7, 2016) states that about 40 years ago there were fewer interfaith marriages. This is true. Going further back in time, at about the turn of the century, interfaith marriages were even fewer and absolutely shocking as communities were closed societies then.
Most people stuck together, residing in mohallas dedicated to their own communities, hence we have names like Parsi Bazar Gate Street, Bohra Bazar and Lohar Chawl. There was scant interaction between the members of the other communities, especially among the women. There were hardly any coeducational institutions and girls went to the girls’ schools such as J. B. Petit, Bai Bengalee, Sir J. J. Girls’ School, Young Ladies High or Alexandra. Even Cathedral had a separate Girls’ School. Few girls went to college and fewer went to work. Even those who went out to work served mainly in banks (many of which were bastions of the Parsi community), at Tatas, Air India or in law firms. The most preferred vocation for ladies was teaching even though it brought in a meager salary and required better education. Nowadays very few girls opt for a teaching career because the pay scales, though much improved, are not as attractive as in other professions. Even banks today are bereft of the Parsi presence.
The working Parsi populace is spread out widely in various corporates, businesses, professions and vocations. Hence there is very little interaction with the opposite sex of our own community. This results in interfaith marriages. Mixed marriages are a modern day sociocultural phenomenon which is not limited to our community alone. Ours being a microscopic number, such marriages appear more rampant.
Mistry ridicules Parsi boys, reducing them to some sort of a milquetoast (timid person). This is in poor taste. I have been residing in a Parsi colony since the last 40 years but I have rarely seen pampered Mamma’s boys such as the ones he has portrayed. Boys of other communities are far more pampered by their parents especially their mothers because they consider sons to be blessings and girls a burden. Our boys play, they gambol, romp, frolic and have as adventurous a time as is possible in the present percentage dominated world of education.
We belong to another era where the attractions were few, distractions fewer; no TV, no computer, no e-games. Maybe a movie on Sunday, that too after standing in a queue for three hours for 75 paise tickets or a walk at Marine Drive in our Sunday best. Learning was a pleasure and not a burden. There were hardly any coaching classes, tuitions were frowned upon and by and large we had a much easier time. Today’s mammas and pappas are quite friendly and lenient, and hardly dominating. Grandparents are much loved. Maybe some misguided souls refer to parents as dustbins or garbage, but by and large this is not the case. Many married sons and their wives live happily with their parents in small flats.
Yes, our boys need some encouragement to study well and study more. But otherwise our youth is doing well in facing the pressures of life in the 21st century. DARA KHODAIJI
dara_mk@hotmail.com