“Challenges for the...”

It is not in me to lagav maska palis (flatter people), and I shan’t make an exception in this case. But I am ever ready to give the devil his due. May I humbly ask whether this is the same Dinshaw Mehta, chairman of the Bombay Parsi Punchayet (BPP) who always cries foul and cribs that the Parsi Press is hostile to him and his cronies? I compliment you for having the decency, moral courage, and absolute honesty to give a fair deal in letting him have his say, without lagaving any maska ("Challenges for the chairman,” Parsiana, April 7, 2010).

Having gone through the article in detail I am left wondering whether this was a speech given at some review meeting at Dadar Gymkhana, one of the many festas (dramatics), or his agenda. Let’s analyze a few of Mehta’s gems. Fifty percent of our community members reside outside our baugs and are thus isolated from mainstream community affairs. "Present board of trustees hopes to house not only all applicants but also all Parsis and Iranis living in private buildings especially in distant suburbs, to bring them within the colony culture.” There are bawas (very rich people) who reside at Warden Road, Peddar Road, Little Gibbs Road, Harkness Road, Marine Drive, Colaba et al in 5,000-10,000 sq ft apartments. What makes Mehta so sure that these people will come to stay in colonies and adopt colony culture which most of them detest and have remained distant from?

Remember Hilla Towers when everything possible was done to ensure that it did not come up? What makes Mehta so sure that people owning flats (whose value appreciates with time) will sell off their flats and come to stay in baugs, and imbibe colony culture (which is nothing to rave about) and live under the barrel of the gun of leave and license?

At the Dubai Congress Mehta had exhorted bawa migrants to surrender their flats. How many have done so? No one in his right mind is going to fall for this ridiculous scheme. In my colony itself flats are sublet, and many are locked up to be opened for visitors on short stay, perhaps for some consideration. Why should anyone come and stay in Mehta’s transit camp like refugees when they have their own houses? Or they could stay at three or five star hotels, depending on their financial capacity.

Mehta invites suggestions to remedy the declining population. Nothing can be more dishonest after his deplorable performance at Sanjan, and at the navjote of Roshni Maloo’s children. He will pay (though not from his pocket) Rs 3,000 to the second and third child till they reach the age of 18. Only rich Parsis of the baugs will line up. The poor have to think twice before getting married and having a child. For them a second and third child is not even a distant dream. And what after the child reaches the age of 18, who pays the college fees and other expenses? Today schools demand lakhs by way of donations for admission; the BPP’s Rs 3,000 is pittance.

Mehta says he is going to construct three room kitchen flats, of course on leave and license. What will be the deposit/pugree and what will be the rent? How many poor and lower middle class Parsis will be housed? Hardly any, if you ask me.

Even though every baug/colony has its cultural/social activities or club, the youth marry outside the community. What miracle will ZYNG (Zoroastrian Youth for the Next Generation) perform? They are holding matrimonial meetings. Great! There are at least five kajwallas (matchmakers) advertising in the Jam-e-Jamshed every week. The Jamé itself has its own post box. Under the able leadership of one of its rubberstamp trustees the BPP has revived its defunct matrimonial bureau.

Mehta writes he is going to increase the wages of priests. Most priests today work part time as they are employed elsewhere. No priest can earn as much as a doctor, lawyer, accountant or technician, so the BPP must wake up to the ground reality and give up dogmas and diehard mentality. Priesthood is for those inclined towards spirituality who wish to live a simple life without the lure for wealth. So get rid of this notion that only a dastur’s son can become a priest. Open the doors for volunteers.

The BPP chairman boasts about his great victory and conquest when a group of cowards led by him beat up one buddhi (old woman) and a Russian. He has achieved nothing in doing so. The man is a Zoroastrian priest in Russia and is respected as such. He converts others to the Zoroastrian religion and spreads the message of Zoroaster in Russia, which none of the dasturs have ever thought of doing. Try and repeat your performance in Russia, Mehta, but note the Russian mafia uses Molotov cocktails and AK-47s. The chairman and his henchmen will return like sali boti.

The petition of Jamsheed Kanga and Homi Khusro­khan may be pending, but the issue is wide open, and Parsis give a damn about the BPP’s fatwas regarding the two priests who are doing good business. Mehta and his co-trustees along with the six dasturs have become a laughing stock of the community. In reality the priests have been given wide publicity with the BPP acting as their advertising agents.

Mehta writes that he wants to bring about a spirit of harmony in this small community so that there is no acrimony and bitterness. But actions speak louder than words and his splendid performance at Sanjan and during the navjote of Maloo’s children exposes the truth. He and his lackeys have destroyed harmony, if any, in the community and divided it right down the middle which will have dire consequences even after he has left.

The caveat is that for this grandiose manifesta or agenda, Mehta wants a small sum of Rs 100 crore from the Petits, Wadias, Tatas, Jejeebhoys, et al to cater to the priestly class alone. It is anyone’s guess how much he wants for the rest of his agenda. Let him go ahead and make a bakra (fool) out of these trust funds. It is rightly said "Ram naam japna, paraya maal upna (utter the name of God, while making off with what is not yours).”

BEHRAM AGA

behram_r_aga@yahoo.co.in